PANDEMIC

Today was hard to breathe.
The air, light and clean,
My toughts, heavy
and unwilling to leave.

What to study first
it's difficult to mend.
Chest hurts.
Can't even outburst
my heart's content.

No wonder I need to go 
back to therapy.
The daylight is scary,
but wish it to never end.
The night has come 
and so has anxiety.

Sudden relief.
Quietness, dark's bequeath.
A strong desire: to live, 
to study, to paint, 
and to breathe.

And then there's guilt
Guilt for not taking care
(But I am trying, I swear)
of a future spilt.